Elly McCabe Music

Some more lyrics

Every songwriter has a ‘My ex is a c***’ song and this is mine.
We’re on friendly terms now so honestly it is only really relevent to the time of writing! It’s written for piano and vox. and it’s actually really happy sounding. Haha.

Did you notice me at all?
Did you notice when I fell?
In love with another’s hands?
In love with another’s plans?

And did you never wonder why I hated you?
Why did you stop me when I tried to see it through?
To be with him and no longer burden you?”

You had me for so many years, on some kind of leash under control
When all I wanted was to feel loved and free, and I could not see what they all could see,
When I woke up, you were a fucking disease. And I came last in all your judgements. When I first met him, I could I finally see,
What you had taken from me all this time…
Now I’ll reclaim what’s finally mine 

At House of Fraiser stalled
In a Bristol shopping mall
On the floor, with your goddamned plans
Broken up over your demands

And did you never wonder why I hated you?
In the NHS walk in and soaked wet through
My arms bloodied, my head against these walls
Your starbucks trip and my two years of falls.

You had me for so many years, on some kind of leash under control
When all I wanted was to fucking be free, and I could not see what they all could see,
When I woke up, you were a fucking disease. And I came last in all your judgements. When I met him then I could I finally see, what you had taken from me all this time…”

Some recent lyrics

My London show has motivated me to shake off my writer’s block. These are some lyrics for two new songs I’m working on at the minute. Once I get the Flight, 112 and Little Grace EP’s properly recorded and mixed up I’ll carry on writing these. There still a work in progress, I wouldn’t say these will be the definitive lyrics but they’re close. Let me know which lines you like best. :)

Boats and Mirrors

VI.
Milk and ash,
Boats and mirrors
Your fingers trace
My spine shivers

VII.
Every horizon
Under one
If I’m the moon
Are you the sun?

BRIDGE I.
Did you ever catch my words repenting?

CHORUS I

In my head
We walk through walls
Your voice is cast, and mine is sure
That in my heart
Your breath is bait
Cementing plans, forgoing fate

In my hands,
We cradle dirt
Your palms are steel, and mine are burnt
From holding on 
To soil and shards
From a foundation, torn apart. 

BRIDGE II.
Did you ever catch my words repenting?
Did you ever catch my words repenting? 

VIII.
Milk and ash,
Boats and mirrors
Your fingers trace
And my spine shivers

In Cast Iron Shoes
Intro
Doused in loathing and
Held up in adoration
I am waiting to feel alive,
I am waiting to feel alive

CHORUS I.
Alive. 

VI.
Our scars trace up by our elbows
Eager legs cased up in shackles
It’s hard to run off into the sunset
In a pair of cast iron shoes

VII.
And although I tried to surpass it,
Your faith was a burning casket
Of the desire I’d always aspired too -
and now I could never choose.

BRIDGE I.
It never breaks my spirit more than to hear you
Break your own 
It never breaks my heart so bad
Than to feel you break your own
So accept defeat my lonely friend
And accept that you’re not alone -

May ‘13: a long overdue update!

Hello there boys and girls.

I’ve realized I’ve kind of left behind my words and ramblings behind on this corner of the internet for a good six months now and today I decided to do something about my negligence. So, here I am, drinking Earl Gray tea and wondering what to write about. I guess I should start at the beginning!

In January I played a show at The Louisiana 2, Bristol with a very good friend, Michael R.B Garret Music. (Yes, it’s a clicky, go check him out!) It was a fairly chilled out show in the Louisiana’s cellar, which is now the main hub for the venue’s acoustic gigs.

Afterwards we went for a couple of drinks down the harbourside and then truthfully… that was my one and only gig for a good couple of months!


(Photos copyright Laura Sutherland, 2013)

After a few weeks of writing, playing and practise and enjoying my free time I played at the Jelli Records 10th Anniversary Bristol Acoustic Music Festival at St George’s Hall. Unsurprisingly, the minute I got to the venue I was overwhelmed. Have you seen that place?! It’s huge! It was a beautiful sunshiney day with highs of 22c, lots of great acts including awesome Bristol girl band Wolfhound (clicky) (omg they’ve only just left school pretty much and they’re awesome) and the Bristol Evening Post described me and the harp as ‘sparkly’ in their review of the event!

Next up, I had my first London show this Friday just gone…
I can’t tell you how amazing it was to play in the capital of my country!

We decided to make a day of it, so me and the boyfriend got on a super early coach from Bristol to London at 5am and arrived just after 7.30am. We wandered round Westminster and the city for hours, drinking tea on the Southbank, getting lost in the British Museum, ambling up and down Shaftesbury Avenue and Piccadilly Circus and picking fights with pigeons at Somerset House. We had a long and exciting day and neither me or Jack had very much sleep which is why I was amazed I managed to play a half hour set that night in the Ritzy, Brixton without passing out! Personally, I nailed it. It was the best show I’ve played in a long time and I absolutely loved it. I got a great reception and met some awesome people, Londoner’s are pretty cool! I’m excited to go back again. Here are some photos…

4.44am at Bristol Bus Station, having drank litres of coffee and super-hyped up!

Us on the coach, waiting to leave for the Big Smoke.

Chilling in Camden Town with some cider before the show at the famous World’s End pub.

Outside the venue in Brixton and mega excited!
 
Doing my thing… yeah, it was too cold in there to take the leather off. 

So all in all, as you can see, I’ve been up to a fair bit…
Next month I will be playing at new ‘zine LIVE ZINE’S launch party as the main support for I am Horse at Mr Wolf’s, Bristol on the 25th June, and the LIVE ZINE will be running a feature on me including a short interview, so keep your eyes peeled! You can pick up issues from Start The Bus, Rise, Bristol Ticket Shop, Folk House and The Birdcage but they’re in limited supply so do hurry. I’ll keep you posted when they’re out to grab and you can always read online!

Until then my lovely followers, friends, fans and family,

Stay safe, stay happy, and see you at the next one. 

xx

“Flight” EP Taster. Videos and lyrics and a bit of an update.

FLIGHT is the third EP I have written for harp and vocal and was written over a period of 12 months.

It charts the ups and downs of battling self-hatred. I am sorry to say that the lyrics do carry a trigger warning as the EP deals with issues such as mental illness, self injury and ASPD. I can only be honest in my music and lyrics, as it’s the only form of communication I feel I am able to express myself so greatly in. There are no restraints when I write my songs and writing this EP is what effectively kept me going for so long. But now I have pulled through and am well again, I can share my pride and my story with people through a gentler and less graphic format and I can hope that my music can save or comfort others who have been/are going through similar hardships. 

This is not just a means of self-gratifacation and indulgence as personal as the content is: I want Flight to draw attention to the fact that sufferers of mental health in the UK are shockingly discriminated against, both by others but most importantly by the National Health Service and their ideas of CRISIS CARE.  You only have to visit this website and read some of the shocking stories to know how we are cast aside in times of great, great need when we are at are lowest. “It’s like watching you be on the equivalent of a life support machine” I owe my gratitude for pulling through this depression to myself, my family and friends and my music… the NHS had no part to play. They rejected me and turned me away and ignored me when I needed them the most. I am using this EP to support MIND UK’S Crisis Care improvement campaign and to raise awareness of the shocking lack of treatment and care that is avaliable to mental health sufferers. 

Here are some demo videos, not great sound quality but I thought I owed you guys a taster as I’ve been a little bit quiet recently and also some lyrics. :)

Thank you for taking the time to read this, and please, PLEASE do visit this website for more information and on how you can help with the Mind campaign on improving Crsis care: http://www.mind.org.uk/campaigns_and_issues/current_campaigns/care_in_crisis

LYRICS AND VIDEOS
(Lyrics marked with *** don’t yet have a video)

BROKEN BOTTLE CHAPERONE***
I’m facing a night without your warmth
Drive cadillacs into the eye of the storm
Down jack and coke, southern comfort me I’m cold
You shit stirr me up, I won’t do what I’m told

I prefered these streets when they were ours
Don’t think about consequence, just give me hours of your soul
If I had self-control, would I hold back, I do not know
But as it stands with this, I’m in your grip and can’t let go

Ask him if he’s okay underneath my skin
Ask him if he’s okay underneath my skin 

Jealous morning why’d you wake me from this slumber
But I know we both dread the day
And it gets so hard to keep this mask from crumbling darling,
Decaying smiles of evasive insanity

Did I prefer these streets when they were ours
Do I really want you to give me hours
I’m not sure that I wouldn’t rather fade away
And I’m not sure how long I really want to stay

Ask him if he’s okay underneath my skin
Ask him if he’s okay underneath my skin 

Ask - underneath my skin
Intoxicate me and don’t tell me I’m dreaming

How’s it hanging up there on your star burnt throne
You left me with bottles for chaperones. 

RESTLESS

Behind the door you cast your shadow
I watch restless from my bed
Whilst next to me the boy I adored
Knows nothing of my heavy head

These images will break the morning
I watch the shadows on the roof
Epiphany is slowly dawning
There are but lies in all your truths

You have broken me it’s plain to see
That all my dreads are stemmed from your heavy breaths
And whilst you shake, there’s an earthquake in my heart
Take my upset darling, hear me darling, I’m about to fall apart

Her denim shirt hangs in the hallway
Her red lipstick smothers your face
Irrational and anguished torment
Find sanctuary on the staircase

And though you’ll never hear me say this
I could have torn you limb from limb
Now to hurt you seems like such bliss
But I dove in where I can’t swim 

You have broken me it’s plain to see
That all my dreads are stemmed from your heavy breaths
And whilst you shake, there’s an earthquake in my heart
And I beg hear me darling, my cold darling

I’m about to fall apart

PEARLS AND OYSTERS


Mind my knives dear - don’t take them away from me
Pearls and oysters, my one vice
Cuts me so sharply

You’ll never know how I feel about you fuckers
You’ll never know how I feel about you fuckers 
You’ll never know how I feel about you fuckers 

It’s the way the light bends, oh
It’s the way the edge cuts, oh
It’s a way to gauge your own strength
It’s a way to hurt your friends

It’s the way to light bends, oh
It’s the way the edge cuts, oh
It’s a way to gauge your own strength
It’s a way to lose your friends

The knife’s edge
The knife’s edge
The knife’s edge

Pearls and oysters,
My one vice
Cuts me so sharply 

DANCING IN THE DARK (Spare room mind games live video, lots of background chatter)


Comes a time when you have to let go
Burn through memories, it hurts, I know

Tell me I’m lost and crush all my faith
Leave me these words now we’ve gone to waste

Pick me up darling, dust my knees off
Fix these wings up and watch me take off
In my daydreams you’ll always be mine
Because I waited tall’un, but now I’m getting tired

Of dancing in the dark
Losing sleep at night
Thinking of what if’s
And tirelessly loving what

Can’t be made
Can’t be saved
Be restrained
Keep me safe from

Burning up in your gaze
Like a moth to a flame
In the spare rooms haze, made me a victim to your games again…

R.E.M PERCEPTION***
We’re only useful at night
We give up sleep fight after fight
Adjoint thoughts keep us wide awake
Just let me sleep for Heaven’s sake

I thought I caught a smile in my direction
Not as lonely as I thought, in my R.E.M’s perception
Or it’s the rise before the fall, may we all suffer it all
Because in hell we’ll join our hands
Singing Lucifer’s lullabies until we’re finally allowed to die

I made a pact with the Devil last night
She said pop these pills and babe I’ll show you flight
So I went along obligingly
She searched right through my soul, and found
she’s me

And I’m only useful at night
My conscience hangs more left than right
There is no goodness in here
I break apart those that come near

But I thought I caught a smile in my direction
Not as lonely as I thought, in my R.E.M’s perception
Or it’s the rise before the fall, may we all suffer it all
Because in hell we’ll join our hands
Singing Lucifer’s lullabies until we’re finally allowed to die

WHAT IT MEANS

It’s okay to say you’re scared
I am too
Don’t make promises too fast
And I wont, too

And let this be a reminder to me
Let this be a reminder to me

Transcending fast
This hurt can’t last
Sorry you had to see blood red
Blood red
Instead of hot pink in my cheeks

And it’s right on time for this time of year that I burn my bridges
And push away, what’s dear
And I don’t understand this razors sheen and I think I’m lost but I’m not sure what it means
To be lost, and not found
To be lost, and not found. 

And let this be a reminder to me
Let this be a reminder to me